By Megan Sprague

Sometimes, being a parent can be a frustrating experience, leaving overwhelmed caregivers feeling like they have nowhere to turn.

But Paula Patterson and the Exchange/SCAN Child and Parenting Center are offering parents the skills they need.

“We teach positive discipline techniques and how to take care of yourself as a parent while being a role model for your children,” Patterson said.

The Exchange/SCAN Center is offering a 12-week course for parents who have “reached the end of their rope and don’t know how to handle their children,” she said.

“We identify the type of parenting you have been doing, whether it be authoritative, a brick wall or a doormat, and show you how to improve before there’s a fallout.”

An authoritative parent is one who says it’s “my way or the highway,” explained Patterson. A brick wall is a parent who pushes their child away and does not allow themselves to nurture, and a doormat lets their children have the run of the house.

“We take parents who freely volunteer to take the class because they are worried about their relationship with their child, foster parents that DSS refers and recovering drug or alcohol abusers who are getting past their addiction and reclaiming their life,” said Patterson. “We try to empower them and help them make the right decisions.”

Leslie, the mother of a 5-year-old who asked that her last name not be used, is taking the class because she hopes to regain custody of her child.

“It was recommended to me for my case plan, but, really, I think it’s something everyone can use,” she said. “I’m eager to learn how to deal with my child in a very calm manner.”

She said she’s seen too many people who have been out of control and screaming at their children.

“Their excuse is ‘All my friends do it,’ ” she said, shaking her head. “It’s fine to get angry, but when you’re screaming all the time, something is not right.”

Some signs you might want to look into seeking some help are being very frustrated, yelling at your children for doing things they should normally do at that age, or feeling as if you are ready to hit your child and harm them.

“We’re not against spanking, but we feel there is a better way to punish, because it can lead to abuse,” Patterson said. “We tell parents to divert by using time outs or a method called 1-2-3 Magic, where you count until your temper is under control.”

Members of her class are not the only ones gaining knowledge from Exchange/S.C.A.N.

“I’ve learned so much for my own kids,” Patterson said. “I’ve worked here over a year and being able to share my experiences as a parent, it makes a big difference.”

The class runs until July 23 and costs $50 for individuals and $90 for couples. For more information on times and the class content, call Paula Patterson at the Exchange/S.C.A.N. Center at (704) 664-7054.

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